Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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