are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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