i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
