Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many fucks given?
0.12846
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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