Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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