That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
