Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
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