Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
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i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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