At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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