i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
