So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
