All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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