dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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