why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
