It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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