What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
