Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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