do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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