Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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