Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Randomize
