Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
