we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I can't trust your balls anymore.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
