Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry laylakanexo hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.

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(210): View more from Texas

she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?

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(503): View more from Oregon

Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today

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(248): View more from Michigan

i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia

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(503): View more from Oregon

i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?

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(816): View more from Missouri

i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you

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(585): View more from New York

That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS

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(512): View more from Texas

She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.

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