I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
