your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
