He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Of course I have a pirate flag
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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