he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
