Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize