Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Fuck appropriateness.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
