In the future we'll all be gay
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
