My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You took a bar mat shot.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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