Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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