Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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