Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
