The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize