You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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