you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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