Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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