So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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