I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
