dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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