While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
