why didn't you poke me back
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
