Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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