Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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