You're so nebulous sometimes
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
