Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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