No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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