Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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