good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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