I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
